The Sound of My Soul.

One year ago I was fairly obnoxious in sharing my love for a particular series of young adult books written by a thirty-something housewife from Arizona.

One year ago I spent hours reiterating, to naysayers, "It's not a book about vampires. It's not a 'teenage' novel!"

One year ago I wrote many blog posts begging y'all to read what I deemed the greatest love story of our generation.

One year ago I flew to California to view the big screen version of said love story, with two ladies I'd met in early 2008. Women I'd befriended because of our shared love of a particular book, which, at that time, was still rather obscure. We bonded over a sparkly vampire and an ordinary, yet spunky girl. (Heather & Tiffany, I love y'all. Deeply. V4&After.)

One year ago I was proud to to identify myself as a "loud and proud fan" of four books in a Saga too fantastic for words.

What a difference a year makes!

Have you ever had a favorite cosmetic? Let's say...a lip gloss. This particular lip gloss is fan-freakin'-tabulous. It glides on perfectly, shines like the top of the Chrysler building (name that movie!), and never ever traps stray strands of hair on your perfect pout. I mean, this is the lacquer to end all lip lacquers.

So you tell the world about it. "You MUST buy this product--it will change your life and add so much delight to your existence!"

The world heeds your advice and soon this lip gloss enrobes the pucker of every other mouth you see. Fantastic!

Alas...one fine day...some unfortunate gal decides to paint on the gloss with a heavy hand. Oh, woe the sloppiness! Or perhaps you see a well-intended woman wearing frosted pink eyeshadow, along with the gloss to end all glosses.

Frosted. Pink. Eyeshadow.

Your gloss has been ruined. It's intended effect is cheapened. Cheapened like a working gal at a truck stop.

"Hey baby, you lookin' for date?"

This, my friends, is how I feel about the fandom that encompasses The Twilight Saga.

The fiending (a phrase coined by the genius Kristen Stewart in last week's Entertainment Weekly) have taken my beloved love story and frosted it with tacky, sparkly, really offensive pink eyeshadow.

Countless merchandising fails too numerous to mention (I refuse to enter a Hot Topic, on principal alone), a bojillion websites* devoted to the movie and its cast, and seemingly every magazine cover of the past 52 weeks. One cannot escape the phenomenon that is Stephenie Meyer's tale of Bella and Edward.

It's too much. For me. To say I'm over it is putting it mildly.

Cheapened. Heather described it thusly, many months ago. It's truly the best description. And it deeply saddens me.

When sweet Fran inquired earlier in the week, "Are you so excited for New Moon in a few days?" I hung my head. Sighed heavily. And admitted to myself...

"Eh. Whatever."

Will I see New Moon this weekend? Sure! I've heard it's remarkably better than the first film. This makes me happy. Maybe this means all the fasting and praying has paid off. Maybe Chris Weitz reads Lulaville. He is a down dude, after all.

So while the embarrassingly overwrought fandom ("My life is complete because I've been in Robert Pattinson's presence!" Really? Um...OK. No wonder the poor dude is afraid to walk around without 43 bodyguards.) has stolen a bit of my Twilight joy over the past year, I am resolute in my refusal to hand it over completely. Because in the end, my love for this story is remains intact. It's still Edward and Bella. The Edward and Bella I fell in love with almost three years ago. And no one can take that brilliance from me. Even if its shine is slightly murky, I'm able to peer past the fandom flaws and continue to appreciate the beautiful love story dreamt by one Stephenie Meyer.

Yeah. This is hot. I don't care who you are. It is delicious.

If you see New Moon on the big screen this weekend, please let me know what you thought of it. If you are not seeing New Moon, I won't judge you. Promise!

*Before someone feels as if their Cornflakes have been peed upon...I am not knocking any Twilight-related fansite. I've met some of my most favorite people in the world because of a few, very special websites devoted to The Twilight Saga. Sites run by "normal" people. Ahem.

However...I have, and will continue to judge any website run by grown women who attend "Twi-conventions" dressed in vampire capes. Capes bought at Party City for $9.99. (Love you, Lauren.)

Handkerchief In Hand...

I've loved music for all of my almost-35 years. Many songs have moved me to tears, but no song has made the waterworks flow as quickly as this one...

"Poison and Wine," by John Paul White and Joy Williams, also known as The Civil Wars.

Back in the Spring I received a text from sweet Bekah, telling me to run to MySpace, to download The Civil Wars' free, live album...which I did, because 95% of the time I comply when Bekah requests something of me. (That live album is, without a doubt, my favorite musical offering of 2009.)

I sat at my computer, weeping, the instant I heard John Paul sing the opening line...

"You only know what I want you to..."

I have lived the words of this song. No, not with my husband, but in past relationships, both platonic and romantic. This song slays me. It is exquisitely painful. And I wanted to share it with y'all. Please listen...and don't say you haven't been warned. There might be tears. Mine...and yours...

p.s. Thanks, Bekah--again--for the text alerting me that, "The Civil Wars have made a video for Poison & Wine!" You're the kind of enabler I really love. Please visit the taco truck for me this week...and send a pic!

A Mad Dash...

Last week I shared my love of Zooey Deschanel and my certainty of being her best friend. If we were to ever meet, that is. (And thanks to all of you who mentioned her starring role in The Tin Man. I'm watching it now!)

In this week's installment of "I want to be friends with..." I'd like to introduce you to a man I'm digging in the most diggable manner possible.

We have a lot in common. He is married. He has children. He is originally from Georgia and is a Bulldog fan. That right there seals the deal, folks. Georgian by birth, Bulldog by the grace of God. Ahem.

The only differences I see between myself and this man is...well, he's a dude. And he's Mormon, whereas I'm southern Baptist. But seriously...bygones...he's clearly my people. Why?

Because he's written my new favorite book.

Who is this man? Oh, just James Dashner:

Hi, James!

I read his newly released YA novel last Friday. Yes, in one day. I could not put it down.

The last two books I deemed "unputdownable" were Suzanne Collins' The Hunger Games and Catching Fire. So y'all know I'm serious when I beg of you...READ THIS BOOK!

Click here for the book's website.

I read this page turner almost like a screenplay...I literally saw it on the silver screen of my mind. This the best compliment I can give to Mr. Dashner, because his story is so descriptive and detailed. To say I was a captive audience is putting it mildly. I won't even begin to attempt to summarize the story, other than to say it's simply delicious. Delicious along the lines of...Lost. And most of you know how I feel about Lost. (Best show in the history of ever.) Fast-paced, haunting, frightening, inhumane while still being very human, entertaining, and can't-catch-your-breath exciting. This is The Maze Runner.

Yes, I'm certain I need to be friends with Mr. James Dashner. Our kids could play together, my husband would be his family's physician. Surely his wife and I would get along! Then James and I would discuss UGA football ("Let's give Cox another season before we judge him..."), as well as the soundtrack for the movie version of The Maze Runner. Which I will supervise and produce.

Ahem.

Again, I beg y'all...read The Maze Runner. I did not steer you wrong with That One Book That Shall Not Be Named (rhymes with "Highlight."), or The Hunger Games and Catching Fire. I place The Maze Runner right up there with these rock stars in the world of Young Adult Fiction. Seriously.

In My Head I Hear RuPaul Telling Me To "WORK!"

One night when we were 18, my high school best friend and I were getting ready to go out for the evening. I can't remember what I was wearing, but I thought I was looking pretty dang cute...till she turned to me and remarked, "Leigh...you can't accessorize for crap."

I should've prefaced this by saying that my best friend was/is gorgeous. She was the freakin' homecoming queen! (And eventually my matron of honor.) Lauren (not her real name--and now the Warner Robins peeps are smiling!) probably thought she was doing me a favor, in her own, brusque manner. But that comment has haunted me for almost seventeen years.

I cannot accessorize for crap.

To this day I never feel "put together." Sassy. Decked out. Dressed to the nines. No matter how hard I try, I'm just not cute. And I still hear Lauren's voice in my head, confirming my lack of fashion success.

So when I first laid eyes on sweet Summer at Sitscation last month, I audibly gasped. Summer was wearing the most fabulous white dress and I instantly hated her. "I cannot be friends with someone so chic," I thought to myself. Who can live up to such perfection? Not me.

I love when God proves me wrong. Because not only did I fall in love with Summer and her blog, Le Musings of Moi, I found out she is a kindred spirit. A soul sister, in more ways than one.

Seriously...one day I'm gonna be famous. And Summer is going to be my stylist. And we're gonna travel to France and Atlanta and London and just be the sassiest girls in the world. I'll feel sassy, too--because I will have been styled to perfection by Summer. Sigh...I long for that day.

Until then, I begged Summer to let me pick her brain for nuggets of stylish wisdom. I also asked for pictures of her fabulous self, so that I could share this wisdom with y'all. Because that's how much I love her--and that's how much I love each of you!

Please enjoy Summer, soon-to-be a ridiculously famous stylist. For me. When I'm rich. Ahem. (She's also funny as all get out, to boot!)

Lula: Define your style for me...

Summer: I have somewhat of a feminine style, but always with a bit of edge and funk. Comfort is big for me, too, so I'm not into the trends that don't make me feel comfortable. How 'bout we go with "sweet-n-sassy chic?" I think that has always been my adult style. Not adult as in...you know..."bomp chicka bow wow." Adult as in the age of 18. Just making things clear.

L: Since your style is a mixture--sweet & funky--how do you incorporate bits from each into one cohesive look?

S: I would pair a feminine dress with leather boots. Or leather and lace together. I try to be sure that one thing about my outfit is something that stands out...something sassy! Such as a statement ring, chunky necklace, lots of chains (shout out to Mr. T!), a flower clip for my hair, bold colors, or a dramatic pattern.

L: Do you believe the ability to accessorize is something one either has or does not have? Can it be learned? Please say I can learn this, as I've been haunted by my non-sassiness for 17 years!

S: I definitely think you can learn anything when it comes to fashion! And to anybody who says otherwise...obviously, they know nothing about style! A good way to learn about accessorizing is to pay attention to your favorite shows, magazines, and celebs. And obviously I don't mean Rock of Love, Star Magazine, or Britney Spears! Come on girls, use your judgement! And remember, everyone has their own personal style. Find out what you love and wear it with confidence.

L: What are your favorite, basic wardrobe staples?

S: Boots and white Hanes tank tops! Seriously, I wear boots all year round--I don't care what the fashion police say! And white Hanes tanks go with everything! I wear them under girly dresses if I want to tone them down a bit...under sweaters, under button-ups...even to bed! Must. Have. My. Hanes!

Last thing that is a must in my closet? Tunics. Lots and lots of tunics. I always feel cute in a tunic paired with jeans or pants.

L: What items should every woman own--regardless of age or body type?

S: Anything that makes you feel amazing! Honestly, we all have to have at least one item that just makes us looks and feel fabulous. It could be a pair of jeans that make your bootie look just right. A pair of heels that make your legs longer than life. A necklace that adds flair to everything you own. Or even an incredible handbag that shows off your style, even when you're venturing out in sweats. (I use that last one A LOT!)

L: What are your favorite stores? Favorite place to save? Splurge?

S: For good deals I love thrift stores and Target. But because I like to have stuff that won't be seen on everyone I walk by on the street, I've been shopping less and less at Target--for my sassy pieces, that is.

This may seem crazy, but I hate splurging! To me, especially after thrifting, Forever 21 and Charlotte Russe both seem like quite a splurge! Although...for Mother's Day last year, my husband gave me my first pair of Louboutins. If I ever save my spending money long enough, I could totally see myself splurging on another pair of those. Mmmmmmm, baby...come to Mama!

See why I just love her? And why I want her to take me from frump to fabulous? I also want her legs, but that's another post for another time...

Thanks, Summer--I'm so glad I decided not to hate you. And you know I say that with all the love in my heart.

Oh yes...wanna know the winner of the fantastic clutch and iPod pouch? Sure you do.

Random Integer Generator

Here are your random numbers:

29 

Timestamp: 2009-11-06 12:04:09 UTC

Number 29 is...SUNSHINE! (Her blog is private, so I can't link her!) Congrats, Sun...I'll get your goodies to you right away!

(My favorite friend, Lauren, has featured stylish friends on her blog...and that's where I got the idea for this post. So thanks, Lauren. I'll never be as sassy as you.)

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year!

When I was a child there was nothing more exciting than coming home from a day at school to discover the Sears Wish Book in our mailbox. Oh, happy day! My brother and I would fight to see who'd get to peruse its pages first. And I'd always win because he'd get distracted by He-Man...or maybe it was She-Ra's boobs. Whatever.

I'd curl up on our couch with that coveted Wish Book, a Debbie Cake (as we call "Little Debbie" treats in the south), and an enormous glass of milk, and oooh & ahhhh my joyous way through each flip of its pages.
This entire scenario was pure childhood bliss. I remember it so fondly.

Alas, now I am an adult. And the Sears Wish Book no longer holds sway over me. Because it has been replaced...

I give you The Mother Ship's Holiday 2009 Catalogue!

Mine arrived in yesterday's mail. After putting my girls to bed, I curled up on the couch. Instead of Debbie Cakes and milk, I had a more grown-up snack of Shiraz and a bunch of mini Snickers from the girls' Halloween loot. I'm not ashamed to admit this, either. I'm also not ashamed that I earmarked nearly every other delightful page of this year's holiday offerings.*

Stila and Cargo and NARS, OH MY!

It's pure "grown up" bliss!

And it is, indeed, the most wonderful time of the year. Sing it, Andy!

No one does it better than Mr. Williams. No one. Don't even try it.

*Dear family members who read Lulaville but never comment...you know Sephora gift cards are always appreciated, for both birthday and Christmas. Thank you. Love, Me.

New! Free! Yeah, That Got Your Attention.

A day rarely passes that I don't say, "I want to be friends with ______________." (Fill in the blank!) There are so many famous--and infamous--folks out there that I'm positive would be all BFF with me, if we were to ever meet. In person, that is.

And then we'd begin our relationship and say things like, "Where have you been all my life?" or "Let's get some Taco Bell before watching the Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman marathon," while giving each other mani/pedis and guiltily flipping through the pages of the Enquirer.

Thusly, I've decided to start a new, regular feature here in Lulaville, called, "I Want To Be Friends With..." Please play along with me, alrighty?

Have you ever seen Almost Famous?

It's only one of my most favorite movies in the history of ever.

And it's the film that introduced me to the fantastically fabulous

Zooey Deschanel.

(Pictured here with Frances McDormand & Patrick Fugit.)

Here's the trailer--please watch. No really, you have to see it. My fave Zooey moment comes at 0:12.

Zooey is my style icon.

Witness this adorableness:

(I lust after those shoes. Mary Jane heels. Perfection!)

This dress slays me, completely.

No one does vintage better than my Zooey:

Why helloooooo there, plaid! Simply gorgeous!

"I want to be friends with Lula..."

Yeah, she's totally thinking that in this shot:

On anyone else this dress would be cheesy.

Zooey makes it fresh, whimsical, and utterly chic.

She's a genius, clearly.

I want Zooey to take me shopping...and school me in her ways.

And if it's not enough that she's an amazing actress and fashionista, Zooey is also an utterly talented musician. She performs with the awesome M. Ward, under the name of "She & Him." Please love this video with me, as it is completely enjoyable.

Do I love that She & Him took a Motown classic (by the great Smokey Robinson & The Miracles) and made it their own? I do. Oh, I really do.

In honor of my inaugural edition of "I Want To Be Friends With..." I am now offering the chance to give one of you something especially delightful.

Check out this gorgeous wristlet & iPod (or cell) holder:

Are these not two fantastic pieces?

These make me feel uber-sassy...like Zooey!*

The inside of the wristlet is the same fabric as the flower--so chic!

Sweet Abby, also known as sister to sweet Bekah, has a new Etsy shop, Sewing Snails. ("Snails" is her nickname, and what I call Abby...because Bekah calls her "Snails.") Check out her offerings...the citrus half-apron is cleverly cute. I'm talking better-than-Anthropologie, y'all. Really & truly!

Want a chance at winning the wristlet and iPod (or cell) pouch? If you live in the US or Canada, simply leave a comment and tell me whom you'd want to be friends with. Other than me, that is. Comments will be closed at 11:59 pm(Eastern time) on Thursday, November 5.

*No celebrity endorsement intended or implied.

Anything Can Happen On Halloween...

If you've read Lulaville for any amount of time, you know that my most favorite actor in the history of the world is Tim Curry. If you're new to my world of randomness, I'll restate my love:

I adore him.

My very favorite Halloween movie features quite a performance by Mr. Tim Curry...and it's not the role you're thinking of:

Dr. Franknfurter, how I love thee!

Please don't misunderstand--I am crazy over Rocky Horror Picture Show. I own the DVD as well as the CD soundtrack of the movie. I don't get people who don't get RHPS. It's as simple as that. Sorry if I've offended you, but I gotta stay true to myself here. After all, it is my blog.

But that's not what I want to discuss.

My favorite Halloween flick is a little-known gem from the mid-1980's, called The Worst Witch, starring a young Fairuza Balk, Charlotte Rae (of TV's The Facts of Life), Diana Rigg, and yes...my beloved Tim Curry.

I describe it as "little known," because nearly every time I mention it--which is always during the Halloween season--invariably the person I'm speaking with will reply, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

TRAVESTY! Utter travesty, y'all!

My brother and I watched The Worst Witch on HBO throughout the 80's, and then on the Disney channel in the early 90's. When it became available on DVD about 10 years ago, we snatched it up as if the DVD case had diamonds embedded in its spine.

This little gem of a movie has terrible special effects, and the acting is not exactly the finest in the world. (Apologizes to the always amazing Diana Rigg, who saves the movie with her subtle yet campy portrayal of Miss Hardbroom.) In fact, the one word I'd use to describe The Worst Witch is cheesy. But it's adorably cheesy. And I love it.

Today, If you have not yet dropped any LSD and need to take an acidic trip, may I present to you now...Tim Curry as The Grand Wizard in the best little movie ever, The Worst Witch:

I've always thought that this musical number embodied what it must have felt like to have been at Woodstock.

Seriously.

Have you seen The Worst Witch? If so, please share your glee with me. If not, please do us both a favor and rent it! Or, share your favorite Halloween film with me. It won't be as cheese-tastic as a movie about a school for young witches, but I'll take your recommendations into consideration.

Tickled Pink.

My Sweet Caroline,

Tomorrow (October 27th) you'll turn 4 years old. I love that you share your birthday with your Great Aunt Mitzi, even if you never did get to meet her. I love that you were born in October, because it's my second most favorite month of the entire year. And I love that you're a little girl...because, like your Mommy, you love pink. And, like your mommy, you're obsessed with breasts.

Yes...breasts. We are not afraid of that word in this family.

We both appreciate a good pair of boobs. And we're not afraid to admit it! For the first year of your life, you really appreciated my set...because that's where you found nutrition, warmth, and comfort.

October is not only your birth month, it is also National Breast Cancer Awareness Month. It deeply saddens me that breast cancer is the most common form of cancer in women, aside from non-melanoma skin cancer.

I hate cancer. And I hate breast cancer the most of all. Imagine our precious boobs being attacked by the most hateful disease in the world. It really, really stinks.

My prayer is that a cure for all forms of cancer is just a mere breath away. Until that day, know that I'll do my best to educate you and your big sister, so that we'll maintain proper breast health. We gals have to stick together...our breasts are far too important to us. Our lives are far too important to us.

Cancer can suck it. Yeah, Mommy said, "Suck it!"

Happy birthday, my Sweet Caroline. I pray that by your 14th or 24th birthday, breast cancer--and all forms of cancer--will be a thing of the past. October can be National No More Cancer Month. Oh, we'll still wear our pink ribbons...but they'll be on our frilly, fancy brassieres. We've earned such luxury!

I love you,

Mommy

xoxo

Hopelessly Devoted To You, Vegas Style!

I'm such an attentive person. When I'm with my friends, I'm completely focused on being in the moment with them.

I took my 100% in-the-moment self to Las Vegas last week, to celebrate SITScation, a gathering of women bloggers who've all been united by The Secret Is In The Sauce. SITS was founded by my two BFFs, Heather & Tiffany, as a way to unite women (and a few men!) by increasing their blog traffic, encouraging comments, and providing tons of new sites for the SITStas to read.

Having been a SITSta for the past year and a half, I was so excited to finally have the chance to meet ladies I have "known" for most of my entire blogging career. I mean, meet them in person. That's a Very Big Deal, ya know? I was determined to devote myself to spending hours in conversation with these ladies I've "known," yet have never met "in real life."

So Scott and I headed off to Vegas. Where I met..."Lolli" from Better In Bulk and Laurie from Tip Junkie, two of the most lovely women in the world.

Oh, look...there's me--in the background--with the famous blog designer,

Julie, from LeeLou Blogs!

Look at how I'm utterly devoted to conversing with

sweet, precious Julie. (Whom I really, truly adore!)

I didn't take this picture of Michael & Katrina...

but so many of us prayed for Michael during his brain surgery back in the winter...

...so I'm happy to have this picture of my "in real life" friend & her healthy husband!

Yes, this is the famous "Kat" from Sunshine & Lemonade!

I was all, "Dude--I see you all the time!"

Therefore, I didn't find it necessary to hang with her 24/7 while in Vegas..

See my devotion?

(Kat, you love me...right?)

I also did not take this picture...

...of my too-fabulous-for-words heels.

Which were comfortable, but not on the dance floor!

Not only am I devoted to my pals, I clearly take great care of my camera.

It never left my side for one moment.

More like...um...120 moments!

What better way to celebrate your birthday than in Las Vegas!

Shannon of Welcome to the Nuthouse, wore her birthday crown rather regally.

She's yet another "in real life" friend, whom I talk to regularly...

...so I was all, "Love you...here, take my camera!"

Actually, I didn't tell her to take my camera. She (and others!) just did.

'Cause that's how we roll.

Oh, but that gal throwing up the peace sign?

MY STARS! It's ELENA, from Manwaring Moments!

Can I tell you how excited I was to finally meet Elena in person?

And how thrilled I was to sit in her presence...for all of half an hour.

Sigh...our time together was too brief.

She had no qualms about capturing precious memories with my camera.

The one I left behind. Because I'm so attentive. Ahem.

And here we have Francesca, of Mayhem & Moxie,

and Kathy, of Mama's Losin' It.

Yes, both are very famous girls, with whom I was honored

to speak with on the SITS panel during Saturday's sessions.

These are two of my favorite people in the world.

Look at them posing...smiling for the SITStas...

And then there's me...good ol' Lula...

rummaging through my purse.

While sitting in front of a room full of people.

Yep...hopelessly devoted to the task at hand. No doubt.

Truly, my devotion during SITScation was never more evident than

when my beloved Angie, of Seven Clown Circus,

was pouring her heart out during our panel discussion.

Angie--she of gorgeous hair, face, body, et. al--even posted

on how I sat in rapt attention, hanging on her every word.

(Please ignore the fact that I have 19 chins in this picture.)

"But I was Twittering!" I wailed to Angie.

"Um...yeah...your phone is sitting in front of you!' she countered.

Dang.

But then I realied...

I WAS PRAYING!

Yes, there I am...in front of 100 women...praying my little heart out...

"Dear God, please bless my sweet friend, Angie...and help me

to not covet her most beautiful red hair!"

The SITS Panel.

Also known as, "Dude, I am so not qualified to be at this table!"

This is where I started singing

that Sesame Street classic...

"One of these things does not belong here,

one of these things is not the same..."

Yeah...uh-huh...

And I still have my hands in my purse.

Francesca, Tiffany, Kathy, Me, Angie, and Heather

What saddens me more than anything is that

I didn't get a single picture of me, Tiffany, and Heather together...

...the entire weekend. (Thank God we had our cruise vacay last month!)

Because obviously, I was too busy being devoted to

everyone else attending SITScation.

Clearly.

Honestly.

Completely.

All while praying...without ceasing.

Oh, but you're welcome, girls...

My Phone Went to Sin City.

We've just returned from five days in Las Vegas! I know y'all want to hear about Sitscation '09, and I have so much to tell (it was amazing!).

Before I fill you in on all the delicious dirt regarding some of your favorite bloggy peeps, please allow me to share a few of the pictures I captured with my BlackBerry while in Vegas. Because honestly, I take photos of the most random stuff in the world. Even in Vegas. Ask Bekah...she'll confirm. (But she won't tell about all the secret pics we send to each other. Will you, Bek?)

Me: Honey, pose by that Roman statue.

Scott: Uh...seriously?

Me: Yes! You are hotter than a Roman statue!

Scott: HARDER?

Me: You perv, I said "hotter."

Scott: But "harder" is applicable, too.

I love him. And his Caesar-esque hair did.

Thank you, delicious crab of the sea,

who died to provide this fantastic meal for me.

And thank you, Joe's Stone Crab, for preparing said dead crab for me.

It was a foodgasm. The end.

Here's a transcript of the text that accompanied this picture:

Me: LAUREN! Look! I gasped! Audibly!

Lauren: That was designed for me, clearly.

(Because yes, I photograph lingerie in Macy's, so my friends can

share in the glee of a perfect find. That is not at all creepy.)

Heather gifted me with this hat.

It is the best hat in the history of the world,

and I defy you to try and prove otherwise.

Best. Hat. Ever.

Not only does our other BFF, Tiffany, have this chapeau (with a magenta fleur-di-lis),

Lafayette was also wearing one in the season 2 finale of True Blood.

BRILLIANT!

Is all I can say. And thanks, Heather. I love you!

Nope.

Gambling doesn't pay.

Not when The Venetian gives you $25 with which to play.

Not when you hit $111.85 on the penny slots.

Don't gamble, kids. Nothing good can come of it.

Ahem.

The Bloody Mary...the perfect breakfast drink.

Look at all those veggies...vitamins...minerals...

...it's the meal of champions.

I'm a champion. Obviously.

Sigh...

more Twilight-related lameness...

"Get Bitten...Be Transformed."

Gee, DuWop...

I really don't want to look like a pasty-faced crackwhore.

But thanks for another marketing ploy to further cheapen a beautiful love story.

Yeah Summit, I'm looking at YOU!

If you are ever in Las Vegas & begin to jones for good Mexican,

get thyself to Dos Caminos in The Palazzo.

And then get the grilled shrimp quesadilla.

Oh, hey there! Best food of my life.

What...like y'all don't take pics of your food?

Nikki & I do it all the time.

Pretty soon we'll have a coffee table book, titled,

Delicious Finds for the Food Connoisseur

Or, more simply put,

Our Meals. We Rule.

(On bookshelves, Summer 2010.)

More Vegas adventures to come...right now I have to watch Gossip Girl. Y'all know how I feel about my Mother Chucker.

He would own Vegas. Swoon!

Arithmetic.

"I've been thinking of changing my mind...it never stays the same for long..."

Last week I took a break. It started off as unintended. Sunday passed and I realized I hadn't been on the internet...not one time. No Twitter. No blogs. No recaps of Gossip Girl, The Vampire Diaries, Glee, Mad Men, Dollhouse, or FlashForward. I didn't "window shop" at Forever 21 or Bloomingdale's, nor did I "for real" shop online for Christmas gifts. No perusing of my favorite music websites. No absorbing current events. (And by current events, I mean the world of Entertainment Weekly, E! online, and People.)

Afternoon rolled around last Monday and I'd still not spent any time on Elliott. (That's my beloved Macbook Pro's name, for the uninitiated.)

Wow! I actually can survive without the internet for a couple of days.

This spurred me on. I decided to forgo the intrawebs for a solid week.

With the exception of Starfall.com (Caroline loves working on her letters & I refuse to take that away from her!) and Lauren's Vampire Diaries recap last Friday. (She quoted me in her post--I had to read it! If you're a fan of the show, you must read Lauren's analysis of each episode--you'll pee yourself with laughter. I kid you not.)

"But of all the things I know for sure...You're the only certain one..."

Tuesday morning I spent my "free" hours painting with Caroline. I called my aunt in Mississippi for a nice chat. We--Caroline and I--dusted lampshades, baseboards, and bookshelves. When it was her nap time, I cleaned out closets. Organized closets. Stored away Libbey's too-little clothing, which Caroline will wear in a couple of years. And I de-limed our faucets.

Seriously. Lime-Away is a powerful cleaning product.

Tuesday afternoon found us decorating picture frames and eating pizza with Libbey's two best friends, who came home with us after school. It was good times.

On Wednesday Caroline and I had a dance party in the living room. Libbey and I played tackle tickle. The three of us watched The Great Pumpkin (we love Linus!).

During Thursday's nap time, I cleaned my kitchen and bathroom, all while having the best chat with Heather K. If you've never cleaned while chatting with one of your best girlfriends, then you're truly missing out. It makes cleaning fun. Kind of!

By Friday, my week of no internet, specifically Twitter, was enjoyable.

Yes, I said that.

And yes, I missed my Twitter buddies, and reading the blogs of all my favorite people. But honestly, I'd spent so much quality time with my children, and my house was pretty cleaned and organized. Hallelujah! I felt so accomplished. That's a really good feeling, too.

More than anything, though, my evenings were free. I'm not on the internet during the day nearly as much as I am after the girls go to bed. That's "me time." My "free time." Because my mothering duties are put on hold for a good 11 hours or so.

"See, I'd apologize my way to You...if the heavens stretched that far..."

But what about my "wife time?" Scott is neglected in the evenings, I'll admit it. He does his thing on his computer or on Xbox Live, while I spend hours Twitting or blogging away. It's never been an issue...until we both realized we'd been really missing out on our evening hours of being husband and wife. Oh sure, we take regular date nights. But that's just once a week.

Sans internet, though, we talked. I mean, we really talked. We watched the Generation Kill miniseries. We cuddled. We had a lot of...ahem...fun...cough-cough.

"Cause if I add, if I subtract, if I give it all, try to take some back...

I've forgotten the freedom that comes from the fact...that You are the sum..."

Finally, and most importantly, I spent last week thinking of things that are true...honest...just...pure...and lovely. (Philippians 4:8) I had many talks with God. I also listened a lot. And for this, I am a better wife, mother, daughter, and friend.

My internet break was just what I needed. Little things added up to one big sum, and I knew I needed to recalculate some priorities in my life.

It's been over a week now and I feel better. I am better. And I'm happy to be back.

"When the years are showing on my face and my strongest days are gone,

when my heart and flesh depart this place, from a life that's sung Your song...

You'll still be the one I want..."

(Quotes from Brooke Fraser's "Arithmetic.")

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They clean up pretty nicely, huh?

Just a little bit of...

...Tuesday inspiration...

"We may not be able to accomplish everything we can dream,

but we will not accomplish anything without our dreams."

--Erwin Raphael McManus

Vincent Van Gogh's Starry Night